06 April 2011

Black n White is not good enough - Cryptic

I'm gonna be changing my blog template soon. Becox whatever is here now is all blogger standard template and it's too easy to do the same thing as i do.

Or want the same things as i do.

And everything here now is as simple as black and white, it works the basic, but it's just plain. Maybe it's timeless but it's boring.

So you can copy the boring stuff, i'm moving on =)

You know how it is when girls are good friends and everything is okay. We hold hands go toilet, change out of P.E teeshirt in the same corner of the classroom. You see my bra, i see yours, your panty got holes, we both laugh about it.

But when things go bad, everything changes.

We each find our own alliance of friends to go toilet with, you tell people my bra cup is too big for my breasts and i'm wearing a bigger cup cox i'm a slut and want to attract guys. Your panty got hole, i tell people you're probably not a virgin anymore.

So it's very simple, we're no longer that close, i didn't say it but i'm sure i've made you feel it.

I don't say it becox i'm angry and disappointed, and recently, grossed out. By all the things you've done and is doing. It's like i never really know you. So i don't even know how to approach this by talking. That's why i show you! By actions! A simple idea, GET AWAY FROM ME.

I've never been the best friend anyone could get, but i'm not a bad friend for sure. So the least i think i deserve, and that i could expect for, is for whoever i'm nice to, to be normal. You know, don't have to be nice to me, but don't do bad things to me.

Don't constantly throw me in the bad light just so you can shine.

Last i remember, you're a shining star yourself, you're popular everywhere you go, you're beautiful on your own, your smile is sincere and you're just really, really charming.

So i really, really, REALLY have no idea why you've been doing what you've been doing. It drains me sometimes when i think about it. Like this hate that builds inside me, along with the guilt, like it's my fault you're treating me like shit and i'm not telling you i hate it.

If the problem here is a one-off.. Or if only.. It wasn't so OBVIOUS on each occasion that you try to step on me to raise to a higher ground, if only i'm a little bit more stupid than i already am.. I'd have just live with it. But it's been like that for the past 1 year and 2 months.

For all the times i were on your side, and covering you for all the fucked-ups, i really don't expect this in return.

Now i just want you to go away.

I'm happier without you. I'm happy anyway, you just make me less happy. And i don't need it to be that way. Now i decided not to live with the guilt anymore, becox i've tried so hard to show you that i'm unhappy with you. But you're just too occupied with stepping up to realise. Good luck then.

My advice, Black n White is not good enough, so i'd leave us in the grey.

Oh and Black n White is not good enough, but it makes everything okay. Like just okay-okay. Hahaha! So you can have it, I'm moving on, to COLOURS! =D


We're all different.



How can you be me? I so weird! =D Plus i so under-achiever!
Ohhh.. Maybe becox i humble, you like. Lolol.

18 comments:

XueLing♥ said...

Love the first picture! you look so happy :) & naked lol. But i think you wearing tube lah lolol

Hi, I'm ElaineJieying said...

Just random comment.
I also used to have ppl who supposedly are close to you. But sooner or later you found out that being betrayed or what, you will slowly drift away. Just used to independent. ;)
I'm glad that you choose to drift away rather than staying fake with her. ;)

Anonymous said...

"So it's very simple, we're no longer that close, i didn't say it but i'm sure i've made you feel it."

omg qiuqiu... i totally stoned at that statement for secs. i once had such encounter and things got really bad. ultimately we both figured the misunderstanding (sort of), but things just nv got to be the same again. 2 years have passed, and i still think it's a pity every time i get reminded of our friendship.

think it's good that you gv it some serious thought now, then let the person ruin your life.

Waiyi said...

Make your optimism come true. It'll get better(: cheer up alright! Your originality is not something that can be mimicked or copied, that's why you are unique, and we all admire your naturalness most about you. It's definitely not something that can be faked. It's from the inside, and that's what we see in you(:

Anonymous said...

Loved the first pic u took. show that person how happy u could be.. jia you ok. u knw plenty of girls out there loved you!!

thedwinkoh said...

You not naked right ? LOL

Anonymous said...

is the surname 5 letters?

Adeline said...

This is really an enlightening post! I can so relate this to myself cuz I'm experiencing it currently. Now I know how to handle it. Thanks! :)

Anonymous said...

I can understand. Once I thought I found a really great friend and she WAS awesome. Then she started putting me down and making me feel bad about myself! I was so pissed and upset before I started to just ignore her and get away from her. Guess people change. And I was actually too nice to not say anything negative about her everytime she say something about me. Such a pity because she used to be such a great friend.

SamanthFox said...

where is the like button?! i really like this entry. So true and you said what i couldn't express to the same kind of "friend" i had. i always hope for a decent someone with no ill intentions to go toilet with,recess and partners during P.E back in school. It never happen.

Anyways i thought you resemble Zoey Tay/ Jessica Liu.. you are beautiful in ur way though.. and i hope you didn't just hop up and down in protest that i didn't mention Angelababy instead hahaa

jasmine said...

Awesome post QQ

Anonymous said...

u look malnourished? eat more veggie and red meat ok.. :)

Anonymous said...

Hi QiuQiu(:
it's my first time commenting here.
I've been following your blog cuz I find your posts really engaging. Good english, or rather self-expression there!
Anyways, no one can please the whole world. People who love you, will love you for who you are. Those who matter, don't mind.
So just be yourself and stay happy as always!:D

Si Yun said...

MEHHHH I so agree with you!

"I can understand. Once I thought I found a really great friend and she WAS awesome. Then she started putting me down and making me feel bad about myself! I was so pissed and upset before I started to just ignore her and get away from her. Guess people change. And I was actually too nice to not say anything negative about her everytime she say something about me. Such a pity because she used to be such a great friend."

Very very true :) (^)

Anonymous said...

I recently lost a friend myself, and I can totally relate to this. I guess people walking in and out of your life is very common. Cheer up! (:

Sher said...

totally love this post of yours!
currently going through something like this so i totally understand!

Sue Carmen said...

love this post and yea love you too <3

Anonymous said...

relating myself to ur story.. am quoting the following on my fb status.. =)

"I've never been the best friend anyone could get, but i'm not a bad friend for sure. So the least i think i deserve, and that i could expect for, is for whoever i'm nice to, to be normal. You know, don't have to be nice to me, but don't do bad things to me.

Don't constantly throw me in the bad light just so you can shine."