27 September 2010

How photoshop saved my life

I started using photoshop like 5 years ago but REALLY suck at it when i just started. Tend to make myself look like an.. Alien. Ultra big eyes, small nose and even smaller chin. And one tone face becox i clone everything so lousily. Anyway.. Now i still like the big eyes, small nose look. Hehe. But point is, i think Photoshop sort of saved my life and stop me from killing myself umpteen times.

My complexion now is fucked beyond belief. Yellow, pimply and sometimes it has pus on it. HAHA. Damn gross i know.

And my left eye is droppey.

My face is shaped like a man. Square jawline and prominent cheekbones.

My nose is big and fleshy, the kind that people believe is good becox meaty nose brings wealth. I know, they should just go and die.

My lips sometimes look too thick, other times look too thin. I don't even understand it.

But this, this is perfection, to me. Hehe.
Girl who looks like doll, holding doll, taking a picture, perfect.

See this. And you'd go.......

"WHAT THE FUCK THE CAO AUNTIE ON THE LEFT HOLDING THE DOLL DOLL FOR?! Act cute right!!! And her skin like my door mat lor! Er Xin!!! I think her nose is 3kg. And i can use her face in my O levels Maths, to measure right angles. Come! Lets snatch her doll doll!"

Anyway, the one on the left is 100% un-retouched. Only cropped and resized the picture.

So in many ways.. Photoshop really saved my life. And you can't deny, only the bloggers who bother to photoshop, are doing slightly more than significant.

This doll belongs with me.

26 September 2010

About wishes

Don't know how many of you believe in making wishes.. But i do. I mean, it's free.. That's one thing. But it gives you something to pin your desire on. It's something like goals, but more magical than that. Hehe. Also something like hope, but not so touchy-feely, artsy-fartsy-philosophy.

So if there's a record on the wishes everyone in the world make, i'd probably be ranked top 100 wisher.

Here's a list of the things that i wished REALLY hard for, for a long time.

I wish for a okay pass for PSLE
And i didn't study for it. The only time i revise was 30mins before exam.

I wish that i will have hair nice enough not to have people tease me and call me names
Artica is taking care of it now

I wish for the guy i had a crush on for four years to like me back
This never happen, but it's okay becox i just check him out in Fb, he look old and is quite plump now. LOL.

I wish for a pass for O Levels
And i didn't study for it either, except yes, 30mins before exam.

I wish for better complexion
Soon i'd tell you guys who's gonna be taking care of my rotten face!

I wish that i would be able to send my parents for a short getaway before every year end
Endorsement fee is goood =D

I wish that i have bigger boobs for at least a while in this whole lifetime
Don't wanna jinx it yet!

I wish that i'd be a air stewardess
I did, and then i sing, "Be careful what you wish for~ Cox you just might get it all~ You just might get it all~~~~~"

And so far, all my wishes came true, and the rest are more or less gonna be realised soon. So i guess i'm really blessed. And god sent A LOT of angels to help me move forward in life. And they are the people around me. Sigh~ I feel so thankful like almost all the time. Becox you see ah, I DON'T THINK. Or i just can't think very hard. It's like nothing good ever comes out when i think too hard. So i guess i'm not very intelligent but i have the Almighty who has everything planned sweetly for me. No i got no rich family background, no ultra rich oldman boyfriend, and i am not even born with boobs. So everything given to me wasn't perfect, but i sort of think that everything else falls in place perfectly.

And people around me means something. Even if it's the most casual encouragement they give, i appreciate it super a lot. Becox i always think that NOBODY NEEDS TO BE NICE TO YOU (me). So when people are not mean to me, i feel like, "Oh, that's bonus!" already.

That kid is me! That's my 2nd sis.

When i was younger, she was the one making (most of) my wishes come true! Barbie dolls!!! From kitchen set, to gym, to bedroom sets, she'd get everything for me! Gosh, i want to cry.

This one.. I should wish that my mum would stop dabbing powder on my neck =S

My P1 class photo =((( P1 and P2 were dark times..........

Very very dark times. I can't speak or read much English, don't know maths, don't know what i was doing in a room filled with other children and different adults keep coming in to say different things and i'd get slap sometimes for not answering questions. And, i'm not likable fr obvious reason. Err.. Cox i was stupid?

So everyday in school, I WISH FOR SCHOOL TO END, and then i can go home and watch TV. And my wishes come true, EVERY single time! ^.^

I wish that Xiu Juan here will be my bestfriend back in primary school. And we became bestfriends! Becox we both LOVE to sing. Haha!

Niao Niao and i =D

I rem i was P5 or 6, and i wish that i was not so skinny becox one day after school while playing hide-and-seek, i look at my own hands and i was so disgusted, first time i noticed how the green veins pop out of my hands and i was grossed out lah. So i wish that i wasn't so skinny.

And i wish that i will pass my PSLE without proper revision!!! So i did pass! 227 only lah. LOL. Eh but people say that year damn hard okay? LOLOLOL. I am a loser.

Secondary one. I know, i should wish that i died then.

AFTERMATH of WRONG WISH in P6. I put on weight and look like shit. PLUS, hair so gross even after it grew back from cutting botak. People told me my hair will grow out smoother and straighter after i cut botak. CCB it never lor.

Secondary four.

With BFF Phuaphua. I wished then that i would pass my O Levels even thou i sort of just refuse to study for it. LOL. And yeah~ I did! Not impressive thou. Just 13, 15 or something like that. Totally forgot.

Poly year one.

I wish then that i will have more pocket money and i did, i keep getting modelling job offers then. And i wished that i will be able to move on from the FAILED r/s with the CLJ first bf. And i did, i moved on a wiser person.

 18 year old. I wished that i'd lose weight so that i won't look like some auntie who given birth and decided to keep a head of curly hair. And i did! See below pic =DDD

 There! Lost weight! Bye bye baby fats! This is the last picture without photoshop.

 19, became air stewardess as wished. And picked up photoshop. HAHA.

So.. That about all sums up the things that i wished for that came true. And i am so so so thankful for everything that's going on now. And going to happen soon. I thank the one up there, EVERYDAY. And he/she doesn't really have a name, but it's just someone up there i believe care a lot for me. Like.. Someone else that i believe in other than myself. Someone stronger than me.

So.. Make wishes =))
And make them come true! =D

Going to end this post randomly..

Wish that i'd look like Angelababy. Happened. LOLOLOL.


21 September 2010

My Pet Peeves - Outdoor

You guys know i am generally quite nice. But people cannot get in my way. Cannot upset me. Cannot provoke me. Cannot be a slut and then turn around to call me a ah lian. But in any case ah lian got more integrity than cheena whore please. So i am generally nice, until people are not.

These are a few more things that can make me otherwise, a very very nice, harmless, non-violent person.


Human Blockbuster

Do not bloody block my way. Do not block anybody's way. Do not stand put in the middle of nowhere and start using your cb phone when everybody needs to pass that space to get to somewhere else. Do not squat down to clean up your son's ice cream mess. YOU BRING YOUR PHONE, YOURSELF and YOUR SON TO ONE SIDE, and do your business there.

Also do not stop in front of me to eat something, i will shove you from the back in hope that you choke on it.

Worst thing is couple strolling. I HATE STROLLING COUPLES WHEN EVERYONE IS MOVING FAST IN A LIMITED SPACE. You want to stroll and stroke buttocks, go garden. And when people snarl at you, don't give them the "jealous people" look, we're not jealous, we're simply pissed. But honestly, it'd help it you are good-looking couple. Usually i get more pissed when the couple is ugly and less pissed if they couple is good-looking and then i'd think to myself, "Okay, fine. I give it to you since you guys are gonna add beautiful-looking human beings to the world" LOL.

To counter this problem, i think there should be this device, where it's battery-operated. And when we wanna use it, we on it and it becomes HOT. And then we'd just press it against anybody blocking our way. It has to look like a cup of something, or a bowl of something so that it doesn't seem so intentional that we're out to hurt. Burn all the inconsiderately slow buggers.

Act-cute Girlfriends

You want to act cute to your bf, hit them while you shake your boobs and pout your lips, whiny punch them, tair them, pinch them, slice their dick whatever, okay, go ahead. DON'T WHISPER TO THEM WHILE OBVIOUSLY TALKING ABOUT ME!!! When your bf turns back and look, you pretend to hit him. And then you both laugh. FUCK YOU UNDERSTAND?! It's not even funny, IT'S RUDE.

It's rude to do that to anybody. I get this too often, i know it's becox most of the time i don't have makeup on, i dress in frumpy clothing and i look like a tall, undernourished transsexual with long hair. But if you wanna talk, TALK DISCREETLY. Don't pretend to talk discreetly when you enjoy everyone else attention by laughing out loud and covering your cb mouth while whispering into your bf ears.

It's almost like i got harassed, raped  and cheapened by somebody's eyes and words, right in my face everytime this happens. And i get the same thing even when i dress up. It's like act-cute childish girlfriends will always think it's cute to laugh uncontrollably at some other girls. IT'S NOT CUTE, OKAY? Your bf will cheat on you. Laugh about that. And you will get pregnant at 16. Laugh about that. And you will fail your N/O levels, LAUGH ABOUT THAT.

Qio, Qio lan ah.

Needy MRT commuters who hint the wrong passenger for seat.

I know this whole thing about priority seats for people who need it more than us. And i am all up for that. But if you are a commuter in need today, PLEASE GO HINT SOMEBODY WHO IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE ON THE PRIORITY SEAT, AND HINT THAT FELLA TO GIVE UP THE SEAT THAT'S RIGHTFULLY YOURS. Okay?!?!??!!

Don't hint me when i bounced to the end station just to get a prime seat, which is in the centre of the row of seats, furthest seat possible from the priority seats. So if there's anybody that should give up seat to you, it should start from the outside.

Please tell your grandma, grandpa, grand aunt and your pregnant sister / friends, don't hint the wrong people for seats. It's the thick-skinned people sitting on priority seats!!! It's them!!! Please......... Inform them. It's like i can't even count how many times i have to give up my prime seat to pregnant ladies or old ahpeks / ahmas. And then i'd feel the hatred when i am standing there, looking at the bastard sitting at the priority seat and trying to figure out where he might be injured. And EVERYTIME, EVERY SINGLE TIME, they are perfectly fine except skin too thick. So then i'd curse that something will happen to them, so that they will actually deserve the priority seats. Like maybe the guy will get pregnant or grow REALLY old tomorrow or simply, break a leg or two =D

Smokers walking out of the lift, smoking

Nuff said. You will get final stage lung cancer for being stupid and for being a killer =)) You will.

Taxi with GREEN top light on but won't stop becox got cheena whore in front seat with him.

Okay lah, any taxi that has green light on, but won't pick up passenger is guilty. WHY THE FUCK YOU DON'T CHANGE TO BUSY OR SOMETHING?! Green light gives people false hope! I usually only start cursing the 4th taxi onward that comes along with green light but doesn't stop. Hahaha.


I don't know how to describe how i feel towards Q-Cutters. Thing is if somebody ask if they can cut my queue, i'd most probably say yes. Becox if they have the guts to ask, they must be really desperate to hurry. But people who cut my queue for food, taxi or any sort of queue for that matter, i think other than the fact that they have really bad up-bringing, they will end up with some sort of unimaginable karma. It's like i never seen them again in my life, i guess something really bad must have happened.

Don't stop me from cursing them, you all should start by stopping people who cut Q. You know i am NEVER kind to people who cut Q. I give them this cold, heartless stare everytime. And i promise myself that i would rather save a dog, a hamster, a goldfish from drowning than them, if i have a choice. This is how much i hate them. Becox they are generally very shameless. If they can eat into people's advantage for their own benefit just like that, imagine what kind of people they are at work and as a friend. Eeeew.

To counter this, somebody just gotta tell them where the Q is. And if they bua bodoh, then go tell the cashier, please. If the cashier allows or doesn't care, then it's no longer the Q-cutter fault, now it's all about making the cashier lose his/ her job OR it's time to win some complimentary voucher by writing complaint letter. LOL.


SCREAMING KIDS that are not so cute to start with.

All i could think of is to SLAP them till they STFU. But. It's just wrong......... To use violent on children.. I know.. So, I think kids who scream too excessively should wear a muzzle =)))) I know right, i can be so smart sometimes =D And parents who allow their not-so-cute kids to run around crazy and scream like wild hyenas, you deserve a death penalty. Confirm. If you ever wanna die, i'd gladly say yes, but please foster your kids to a new family first. A family that can bring them up to be normal human. Cox obviously, you're failing that part.

But cute kids screaming and dancing, that's totally fine ^.^ That's quite cute actually.

- - - - - - - - - - -

So please please please, we can make our place a more pleasant place to be. Start reproducing with only cute and good-looking people but if that's so hard, just be a little more considerate.

20 September 2010

Artica does a better job

This is me in Budget Barbie Ep3. Haha. Everybody love my hair!!! And i did it at Artica right before filming just to prove to people that i can look close to my pictures, OKAY! Screw you all.

I thought people started loving me becox of my hair in Ep 3.

 But no, Ep4 is out and everyone (except a few unwise resistant ones, LOL) loves me.
Watch Ep4 here!

I don't know if it's becox now i'm okay to let people know how much a fool i can be..

Or it's simply becox my luck is pretty alright now. LOL.

You gotta watch out for the fan part. I love wind, i do!!!
Wind let us air our armpit and wind makes us look chio.

 Ep four you get to see most of the items modeled by me. Lol.

 And win this green crop tee in this episode!

Remember to leave comment with registered account hor.

Or you can win this usagi band along with three hair bows.
Same thing, leave comment ^.^

So i guess people like me for me. Not just my hair but if my hair is always flat and dry, i think that'd be enough reason for a hater to leave a hate comment. Haha!

Straight hair doesn't make me look barbie-y *snort*

So Juno comes to the rescue~ ^.^
As usual!!! He's always so dedicated lor. Can see he's blowing on my hair right?
So i don't get hot hair on my scalp or face.

And this time, you don't see black chanel-inspired bag. Lol.
I change already, fake longchamp my sister got for me. Hahaha!

With the best hairstylist in the world!!!

And Nic blowing my fringe. I NEED TO LEARN how to do that for myself!
It's like immediately i have Jap side-sweep fringe.

And the end-result~ VOLUME HAIR with nice curls~~

Love my hair so much i am going to marry myself.

Unbelievable. LOLOL. HOW! I LOOK SO CHIO HERE!! So chio i think i can never get a chioer picture of myself in this whole life! Haha!

Artica at Far East Plaza #04-82
Contacts: +65 6836 2891
Email: articahairstudio@gmail.com

17 September 2010

Congrats Carmen and Carrie! ^.^

I know, top to toe, no part of me looks like a graduate.
That's why i can only fool around with their robe.

Was at the photoshoot for CC1 and CC2 graduation. And after all the composed, serious and SMART shots were taken, finally it's the kind of photoshoot that i like. LOL. See!




 And with Carlynn doing the fake chair pose. Lol!

This must be the reason why i didn't graduate -.-"

After the shoot we camwhore more~!

Carlynn look so man here!

Carmen with the moulin rouge feel.

Carlynn with the COWBOY feel. LOLOL.

Then i change into this Smiley leopard prints top to snap more pictures! Super comfy!

The CCs haven't get to see their own pictures yet so this is like a teaser to them. Hehe. I hope everyone who finally HAS to work will find a good direction in life. And so do i wish, for myself.



15 September 2010

This has gotta to be the best, ever, ever, ever! Yokozuna!

You heard me whining about how much i miss this place just a few days ago, now you will know why.

Located at the most convenient place (it would be in my house's kitchen if i could choose but no), Liang Seah Street, which is behind Bugis Junction.

Cute girl welcoming you =D

So let's see who's there. Most of us went there after a last minute KTV session and some couldn't make it for KTV but heng they can make it for dinner! Becox i wouldn't wanna miss a sumptuous dinner like that!
Niao Niao my baby sister ^.^
Genevieve, Caesar's mummy.

Sophie, most recent face of my secret-picture collection. Lol. You know i love to snap pictures of ultra chio girls. See here!
Carmen THE GRADUATE. LOLOL!!! Just want to show you that i got SMART and INTELLIGENT friends too. Lolol!!!

And Geck Geck welcoming me to.. OUR PRIVATE ROOM~~~ Lol!

GeckGeck relaxing with magazines already.
Me crawling into the room. Lol!

Act cute!

I told the girls i put on the hat becox then i don't have to walk in and say, "Hi, i am the blogger.." LOL! Cox that'd be quite embarrassing! Plus WHAT IF they cannot recognise me in real lif cox i photoshop my pictures in my blog. So i figured no one normal would put on a hat to have dinner, so i did ^.^

I love that room!!! I REALLY DO!

Time to see what we want to chomp on!!!

Geck yabbling about sashimi with the staff.
The lady (service staff) is 100% helpful and SUPER knowledgeable about the food products lor!

So sashimi came, most of the girls arrived by now and i sneak out of the room.
Becox i don't take raw food but the girls swipe everything off this HUGE serving of sashimi. Must be damn fresh and yummy.

I sneaked out to snap pictures for you all to see hor. Good blogger? =DDD

A chef preparing Salmon tataki for serving.

And i present to you..

Salmon Tataki.
The only thing running in my head the past few days.
SEE THIS.  I never manage to get over it.

Pari Pari roll

Randomly, i snap a picture of Sophie. I swear after this post, she is going to be very weary about me. LOL. Sophie, TRUST ME, i come in peace and i mean no harm, i just like to look at you! LOL.

Yoko Yoko. Remember? The big ball of happiness i was telling you about!!!
Centre-filled with shreds of crabmeat stick. Topped with warm serving of special mayo-mix sauce.
And then torched before serving! SIAO ONE!!! SO MUCH EFFORT!!!! BUT I DOWN IT IN ONE MINUTE!!! Too yummy!!! Too yummy!!!!!

Yummy prawn gyoza!
I must say that i love all kind of dumpling skin more than the filling but this one, i love both!!!
Becox there's no rubber-like stuff inside, unlike most of the gyoza / dumpling that i have elsewhere.

*pervert grin*
Hi...... Sophie.....

Placing your new friend's picture in between food item,
and inserting pervertic captions like that, NO-NO.

Ultra crunchy and crispy ebi tempura.
Batter is super xiang!!! Prawn super fresh! What more can i ask for already!

Juicy scallops, i can keep eating this while watching TV lor!
How is one plate enough!!!

Fresh oysters, deeply loved by..

Carm and Niao. It's like they are doing the "Cheers!"
They love it so much they had second serving!

Grilled seaweed oyster. Don't be fooled by the unappealing look of it.

Chicken karage! Outside crispy and inside juicy and tender! Why like that one?!
Only thing i'd love for it is to be more saltish. Lol. But that's just me.

Deng Deng Deng Deng~!
Foie Gras!!!

Gene finally arrived and ordered one big bowl of Udon.
You think one big bowl is just a matter of speech? NO.

See! Bowl bigger than her head! LOL!
*whisper* and she had TWO big bowls actually.
*whisper even softer* and and, she drank all the soup... YES! She did!

Her size, with her voice (ULTRA LOUD AND POWERFUL), no match.
Her size with her appetite, no match.
Her size with her dog, TOTALLY NO MATCH.
She's weird!!! LOL!

Must spoil your feast on pretty ladies with a bigface freak, ME~ =DDD

But the only thing you and i need to know is.. He creates wonderful dishes!
Chef~~!!! Thank you!!! THANK YOU~~~!!!

Chef Francies ask if there's any other dishes we'd like to try.
We were about 9/10 full plus we were shy..

So we only added on,

1 pair of oysters,
1 plate of Salmon Tataki
1 plate of foie gras
1 Salmon pizza
1 plate of prawn gyoza


Please don't hate me please don't hate me please don't hate me!

Chef Francies still looking at the menu, trying to ask us to order more specialty!

And yes, this was actually also one of the snapshots of Sophie out of many.

One more..

And one more.. LOL. Sophie, you know i am normal right?!
All these is for entertainment purposes!

Salmon pizza finally came~ ^.^

Plenty chunks of salmon inside.

And Carmen totally in love with the second serving of foie gras.

While waiting for dessert (which is also recommended by Chef Francies although we were quite paiseh becox he is feeding us like we are princesses!) everyone play a fool.

Somebody pulling me from behind.. Plus i lost my arms.

Sophie being freaky. I got another one to show but photobucket is screwed =((
Show you guys next time! A post dedicated to Sophie. LOL.
Like, "Freaky Sophie" Will that be very mean?

Niao niao act chio. Lol.
Somebody saw this on my twitter and say wanna marry Niao Niao!

Dessert!!! Not just ordinary ice cream!

Tghe base is butter milk bread pudding!!!

I WILL DO ALMOST ANYTHING to eat it now!!! Like now!!! I just love how the cold and the warm gets together.. And everything just blend and melt in the mouth.

This dessert is a lot like Love.........
*dance and slow-mo jog on the beach with scarf in the air"

Group shot~!

Too bad Geck left early =((


I swear even my camera loves Sophie more. Choose to focus only on her.
And i have to sharpen Carm, Myself and Gene on photoshop =(((

With back facing them. So i wasn't aiming. But quite zhun leh!

Check out those legs.....
And Gene, i will still punch your nose if we turn enemies.. Okay? LOL.

Sophie looks like she's posing lor!

Gene looks like a tour guide here and Carm is totally happy with Gene's intinery and Niao saw the Merlion. LOL.

Thank you girls! Thank you Niao Niao! Thank you Chef!

 Tel: 6336 3103
Mon - Sat
12:00 pm - 3:00 pm
6:00 pm - 11:00 pm
12:00 am - 3:00 pm
6:00 pm - 11:00 pm

I am going to end the post with...








Sophie, i love you.


 Like how i love Salmon Tataki =)))

P/S: Get $15 YOKOZUNA voucher when you spend $50 at Georgie Elysee!