05 September 2013

Why i even give a f.

You might have heard people say.. "I don't care about what others say, i just do my own stuff"

But these are the people who have probably spent enough time giving fs until they have improved and be better and earn so much more until they can afford to don't give a f to what others are saying. You know what i mean right.

When something is precious to you, of course you put in a lot of thoughts and considerations to what people think about it and you wanna know how to improve.

But then as time goes.. I just feel so frustrated about caring becox after sifting through what everyone who thinks they have an opinion good enough to be shared..

I realise that i always have more people liking / loving me than those who doesn't.

Always. At any point of time.. Through any drama.. Past every phase of my life..

But why do i still give a shit about the small percentage of people who make nasty remarks even when most of the time, it's untrue and unfair.


One episode of Budget Barbie went down rather badly (maybe a year ago) cox that area simply have no shit to shop, do i blame myself, yes and no. I blame myself cox i was just too over-confident that i can definitely spend $100 on good stuff everywhere i go but i don't blame myself becox a reality show is as such, i get good buys, i get lousier buys. Sunny days, rainy days, kinda out of our control.

But the point is..

Life goes on.

I'd love to think that way and just carry on but from the comments of that episode, i decided to stop reading comments altogether. Except to choose the winners for the episode lah. I pick by random. So i no longer read through all the comments and this is one of my biggest regret cox occasionally when i do see some comments (cox i have to announce winners on the comment page).. I see the sweetest comments from girls who really like me and look up to me.. And that's the kind of innocence i see when i have events / flea and girls come and say hi to me, ask for a picture or a hug.. Things like that make me happy. Almost as happy as reading nice comments.

But i don't wanna go through them anymore cox there will be that 10% of the comments sitting down there looking like monsters. Like they want to consume me and my happiness. Like they can.

So i stopped reading comments! Becox everytime i see something nasty / untrue / angry / rude / demanding like i owe them a fking living, i blow up.

I know, you're gonna say "Not everyone's gonna like you" Yeah shut up, did i ask for them to like me? Don't be a fking smartass. You don't know until you see the comments people can say. And they are not saying it to you, so you won't feel it. And when i see it, all i see is these people want me to go down. They can dislike me and stay there, but they want me be ripped off of my job, my popularity, my following, my self-esteem, my everything.

Yeah, bring it. I am not going down. I am afraid i might even have to go up up up =D

You think by typing

"We are not haters. We are neither fans. we watched the videos because clicknetwork has got a great theme for the shows. they got her as host because she used to be good. but now, she is no longer that good. i think as viewers, we have the rights to comment. nobody is commenting on how she look, they are just commenting based on the time viewers forked out to watch her videos, time spent is seriously not worth it more and more. yes, we dont like it, we can dont watch. but why do we watch? because we are expecting something from her. which is WHY SHE IS PAID. give justice to those advertisers who paid their cash on this commercial site. it's the commercial world out here."

It's a commercial world out there? How about it's a gofkyourself world out there? =D I don't dislike you nor like you i just think you should go and take a knife and stab yourself in the heart 5 times and drop dead =D JIANG FEI HUA.


I am not going to go "Oh ho ho yeah you are right i am a lousy host i should probably quit"


That's why you should kill yourself.

I am paid.. So you expect something from me? YOU WATCH FOR FREE YOU KPSMLJ.

Another reason why you should kill yourself. What, why? Since we don't need logic anymore, i can ask you to kill yourself as i wish. Are you going to listen to me? No but i hope yes but no you're not going to do it. You are so stubborn. Why can't you go according to my expectation of you?! And kill yourself?! Why?

You see what i mean?! I don't think most of it makes sense but it doesn't change the fact that it makes my blood boil when i read it.

It's like you think you are the boss of me. Annoying. If i can work well with bossy annoying people, i wouldn't be at home hitting on my keyboard all day long. So thank god i can survive on the internet despite the same kind of bossy annoying people lurking on it. Cox why?

COX YOU'RE NOT (though you are, bossy and annoying) MY BOSS. So don't spend 5 minutes typing me a appraisal like you have to. Spend it wisely like go shave your armpit hair or floss your teeth or read a self-help book title

"How do i be happy when internet people can't make me?"

It is bound to be the bestselling book if there's ever one. Too many people thinking it's our responsibility to make you feel pleased when you come visit. Sorry my blog is not a brothel. Sorry Budget Barbie is not porn. Why don't you call for Mcdees. It never fail to make me happy. Unless of course when they mess up my order or forget to throw in ketchup for my fries.

I am a person. When i am happy and you rub some off me, good for you! If i am angry, and you don't wanna feel angry, you always have a choice to not read. It's the same thing with the show i host!

Where were we. Right. About demanding rude and shit people.

"Hey Qiu qiu,

I am getting extremely disappointed at your budget-clothes-finding skills. Anything above $10 is expensive and most of your items are about $15.

Please put in more effort into finding cheap and nice clothes because if an audience like me can find them at $5 (even in MRT shops), you are a host who is not resourceful enough to be worthy of being called a budget barbie.

Otherwise, I suspect that you are just doing another commercialized youtube show like everyone else.


Suspect lin lao bu. THEN, YOU COME AND HOST MY SHOW. Come! Super annoying!!! WE ARE TALKING ABOUT WITHIN MRT STATION, like i said in the show, WITHIN. If you wanna talk about shops near MRT station, i also can find cheap clothes anytime ah!!!

Fact is i have looked through the WHOLE MRT MAP and their shop listings.

Most of the stations have pawn shop, dental clinics, clinics, bakery, eatz noodle shop, electrical shops, tuition center, manicure salon, hair salon.. But fashion related stores?

And after going through all the listing of shops listed WITHIN the station, i decided to make my way to four different stations where i know there are some fashion stuff at least. And the most prominent one is at City Hall / Raffles Place. If you been there, you'd know that the shops there don't sell their stuff cheap. So.. GOOD FOR YOU YOU ARE SO LUCKY TO GET A $5 ITEM!

So you know what i mean?! If i were to read through the comments, there will be so much i can speak up for myself. But really.. I don't 'have that energy.

Tonight i regret reading through the comments on THE FIRST PAGE alone. In fact i didn't even manage to read pass the first page. Two comments and i'm like "I knew it was the right thing to do.. To stop reading comments"

So conclusion of the story is.. I still care about what people say but i don't have the life to go through them. If i were to sit through the hundreds of comments (though mostly nice / neutral)..

This would be me. Vomit blood.

If it comes to me i'd take a look. If it's out there, so let it be. This is how i look at comments from everyone now.

Reading all the other kind of comments where people have anonymity suck the life out of me. But to everyone who's reading this.. If you have something nice to say.. Leave me a comment on imotiv or on my blog comment section.. I don't miss those =)

If you have nothing nice to say.. Still feel free to say whatever you want and get assorted cancer.

Anyway.. I rant enough. Thank you for running through this with me.

Here are some of my favourite Budget Barbie episodes recently =)

Haji Lane ^.^ Where all the nicest cheapest clothes hides and resides haha =D

Crazy flea where i bought crazy loads of stuff with $100 =DDD

If you don't know yet, you HAVE to watch this for Singapore's very own outlet mall ❤ Where everything is cheaper like up to 70% cheaper than in their normal stores!!!

And to you you and you who have nice good hearts, i hope that you give a f enough to improve and better and to prove them stupid people wrong.. And to make people who love you proud =)

And learn to ignore the ones who think they have it all figured out about you.

I mean really, how can they, when even you have yet to learn everything about yourself?

Keep the dream alive before you get to a point where you feel you don't even have a dream anymore. Here's one for you =') This song sometimes make me tear up.. It's a comfortable song..

I am off to Hong Kong on Friday thanks to Hong Kong Disneyland and Nuffnang =) Everyone should visit Disneyland every once a year at least. To keep the magic going in your life..

And magic for sure doesn't come with writing people appraisals online like you own them and they owe you. Go do yourself a favour and be happy.


Hanna Lei said...

I always enjoy budget barbie. It isn't about just finding the cheapest thing to be the host either you have to be entertaining. A trait I doubt those commenters have. -Hanna Marie

Denise Choo said...

Hi Qiu Qiu,

I've been reading your blog for a long time now and you're easily my favourite blogger really. I like how you're so down to earth and very true to yourself, like you're not afraid of showing the real you to your readers :) I've been watching budget barbie since the very first episode and I just wna tell you to never stop and ignore people who don't appreciate your time and effot to film the episodes.

Have a great day! :)

Anonymous said...

Hello Qiuqiu!

Since some of the viewers are unhappy about your buys. I have a suggestion, why not create like a mini competition, invite them to the show and ask them to use $50 to get cheap buys from specific places?

And i guess with that they would understand how you feel?

Dont give up!
Stay Happy! :)

Anonymous said...

Hi Qiu Qiu,

I have been reading your blog post since last year, following your insta and also watching your Budget Barbie. I knew that you have been putting lots of effort to make all these successful. But, recently I have found that you are so concern about the bad comments in insta/blog/youtube especially in instagram. I think as someone who decided to put their life under the limelight, maybe you should ignore those bad comments and move on. You know better than us that viewers and followers are your source of income. I knew some comments might be very harsh to you, but the way you fought back are equally same too. I think silence is the best answer to keep yourself a better image and shown a good example to your viewer/followers as I think you are the role model of many especially young girls. There are many superstars who received bad comments all this while. I do not think they fought back and they are still a super star right now. I hope to read something more useful/cheerful information in your blog instead. Thanks

Unknown said...

Dear QiuQiu,

Relax Relax! Forget about what some people said. Actually I love about who you are to share your things with everyone like me.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.Be honest and frank anyway. That's how you are you.

You make wonderful, happy & honest blogger. Thumb up!

I am sorry that my English sucks.

Cheers & Hugs! ^^

Unknown said...

Dear QiuQiu,

Relax Relax! Forget about what some people said. Actually I love about who you are to share your things with everyone like me.

Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.Be honest and frank anyway. That's how you are you.

You make wonderful, happy & honest blogger. Thumb up!

I am sorry that my English sucks.

Cheers & Hugs! ^^

Cat said...

How is $10 expensive? Maybe Singaporeans are spoilt or something in regards to shopping? Because in Australia $10 or $15 is a bargain! I'd be lucky to get three items for $100 here!

I am always in awe at the items you get and how many you manage to find. Singaporeans are very lucky in regards to shopping and prices.

Shopping on a budget is about setting an amount 'budget' and doing what you can within that. I think people are confused on what 'budget' actually means. It doesn't mean always being super cheap.

Also I admire anyone that puts themselves out there and blogs. The few times I tried to start a blog, I got such nasty, belittling and b*tchy comments and the sad part is that most of them came from people who were supposed to be my friends :(

Keep doing what you love QiuQiu forget about working so hard to please the sadly VERY VOCAL minority. They can die in a fire or read another blog.

You have the confidence to go out and be true to yourself, whilst they are sitting at home hiding behind their keyboards and the anonymity the internet provides, sad.

The more successful you become the more of these ugly little trolls (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_Internet) you'll have.

You really can gauge success not only by how many people love you but how many don't.

So see it as a sign you are becoming more successful :)

Love Cat

Don't feed the trolls.

sparkly said...

Last paragraph, you should be quoted.

"And magic for sure doesn't come with writing people appraisals online like you own them and they owe you. Go do yourself a favour and be happy. " - QiuQiu

Joanna Lim said...

Hello Qiuqiu! Just ignore them because I still think you're awesome! Watched budget barbie for the longest time and sometimes I still rewatch them. You're a really nice host and everything and I look forward to every budget barbie episode! So do continue whatever you're doing now because we still love you!!
Stay pretty and happy x

Winston Choo said...

hi Qiu Qiu ,
don be discouraged by the bad comment as sometime it is very hard to find cheap and pretty stuff in the given area (understandable) and I saw ur effort in finding the best offer or bargain u can le and I like to say thank u for giving me so many place which I in the past cant think of any where got sell cheap and nice stuff !!! jiayou and hope to see more episode of budget Barbie soon

Unknown said...

I don't usually comment much but I just HAD to write a response to that idiot who posted the 'it's a commercial world' comment, because you're right, whoever it is has a really bad understanding of the concept of 'logic'.

It's true it's a commercial world, but does he/she really know how the commercial world WORKS?? Here's a brief rundown: viewers stop watching a show - ratings go down - advertisers stop sponsoring. If viewers keep watching the show, advertisers will keep paying, why? Because it's all about hit counts, how many viewers do I get to see my ad. Newsflash, advertisers actually DON'T CARE if the show is good or not, they also DON'T CARE if you personally like the show or not, if you watch they pay for it! Whoever it is who wrote that really shot themselves in the foot there. =P

Also, what idiot watches a show they don't like? By watching it, they are paying the show. If they really want the show off the network, stop watching it. Simple. Why would any network pull a show that still brings in viewers??

Qiuqiu, you're totally right to get angered by such idiotic comments. I think your show is amazing, why would so many people watch it if it was really 'bad'??


Unknown said...

Sorry for adding a comment to follow the last one but one more thing...

I hate it when people write as if they're so smart but actually, they aren't. Usually, the grammar and the spelling gives the game away =P

Why oh why did they write 'we are neither fans', what on earth is a 'neither fan'??? Oh, did they mean 'neither are we fans'? That would make sense. Why are none of the letters following the full-stops capitalised? Why isn't 'i' capitalised?? Where are the apostrophes??? Finally, 'it's the commercial world out there'???? Did they mean 'it's a commercial world out there'? If they wanted to end with a wise, all-knowing sort of feel, they failed miserably.

I'm sorry, I'm not usually a grammar-Nazi (well, maybe a bit) but I'm only being extreme grammar-Nazi on his/her ass because they brought it on themselves writing in a pompous 'I'm intelligent' tone when they don't have the skills to pull it off.

Unknown said...

Hi Qiuqiu!

I have been a avid reader of yours for very long now! and everytime I see those bad comments on your blog or youtube or ig I feel so unfair and irritated. just wanna say with lovers come haters. though we always duno why those people like to pick on us but I know for a fact there will be people who love you and support you (like me!) and to the commenter on the 5$ is just ridiculous lol. there is no way in any singapore mrt that you can find a 5$ piece of clothes (unless she buying 1 underwear only??). even the pasar marlam ones outside bishan mrt are at least 10$! All in all though I seldom comment but this time wanna express my support and hope you will feel better (: jiayou! and be safe for your trip!

szepei said...

What a shame the world is full of fools who are nasty, disrespectful, vile, cold hearted people. Don't lose heart, hope you keep up the good work!

szepei said...

What a shame the world is full of fools who are nasty, disrespectful, vile, cold hearted people. Don't lose heart, hope you keep up the good work!

Clarie Cupcakes said...

Leaving you a nice comment to show support and hope that you'll feel more loved! Hahaha.
Love reading your blog entries and budget barbie since idk when and till today I still enjoy it.
Just keep doing everything that you love and not give up.

And safe travels to H.K~ :D

Emiiichan said...

It's easy for people who don't have it happen to them reguarly to say "JUST IGNORE IT!" or "DON'T FIGHT BACK". I truly admire that you are willing to speak out about your honest feelings about the comments you receive. You shouldn't have to only write about 'useful/cheerful information'. I loved the blog post in which you wrote about not conceding to haters and standing up for yourself. I completely agree.
What normal person wouldn't be irritated by what these people write? You're not a sociopath who is void of emotion. I mean, I get mad when I see that people write those dumb, completely irrelevant things on your photos/posts. (Like the lady who wrote 'whore' on your picture of mahjong tiles. I think you wrote about that a while ago.)
And I have no idea what this Anonymous is talking about when they say that superstars who don't fight back remain superstars...Being a superstar has nothing to do with being a doormat and letting people walk all over you. Not to say you aren't a superstar, but people like Brad Pitt or George Clooney probably just don't have time to read every single comment and that's why it doesn't bother them. Or maybe it does bother them but you don't know it because they don't blog honestly like you do.
As for setting an example to 'young girls', I would want my daughter (or son for that matter, because gender isn't really all that important here) to stand up for themselves and be truthful about their feelings (much as you are doing and have done in the past), rather than just sit quietly and let others repeatedly bully them.
I think it's great that you take the time to read and sometimes respond to (both nice and otherwise) comments.
Much love from Hawaii <3

Anonymous said...

i think you should take criticism with more professionalism though.

Agnes said...

Hello Qiu Qiu,

It's me again. Just wanna say, be happy and ignore all of those haters.
We readers will help you to spam more nice sweet comments okay? I always get so upset when i see those people commenting horrible sourish remarks, but i always laugh at them cos their life so sad, can only make awful remarks at awesome people like you.

With Love,

Unknown said...

Hey babe!! You did good!! Don't bother about what the local people says to you, they are probably just some stuck up, demanding, brainless, immature bitchy people trying to find trouble. PS I'm from US currently working here and I love your show through recommendations from friends of mine!!! Keep up the good work!!

Unknown said...

Wow, it must be so hard to read stuff like that. Makes sense that you wouldn't read the comments. I think Budget Barbie is fun and the fact that sometimes you can't find amazing-everthing-is-two-dollars deals shows that it is a real show and you are a real person. Not to mention you are just so cute and fun to watch! I've been reading your blog longer and when I finally saw Budget Barbie I was like omfg quiqui's voice is so cute! Like, not only are you a good internet persona but you seem like an interesting and awesome person too!

Anonymous said...

lol so nice of you to only approve 1 negative comment. loser

jiamin :) said...

Hi qiu again. <3 i know what you're going through. Especially the first few lines. So here's a short i love you message. Just wanna let you know that it's because of you that im so cheapskate. WHICH IS GOOD HONESTLY. and it's because of all the episodes of you being yourself laughing like yourself, talking like yourself, bargaining like yourself. And we all love that. Honestly, im not watching bb for the fashion or for the clothes. but for you. HONGQIUTING. like what you said, there're more people who love you than hate you. and i know its stupid to say to ignore them because i know you cant. but one thing to know is that all of your fans are here. to accompany you and to fk those people up hahahah. nope they're not jealous. but which person in the right brain would say and comment on something like that. :) wo ai ni qiuuuuu, stay strong girl.

Unknown said...

I have to say I am disappointed in the last episode of Budget barbie. But it isn't your fault what, the things sold there are really pricey. But good job for trying your best!(: Jiayou qiuqiu!(:

Anonymous said...

Hahahaha! That self drawn picture I at first thought is Qiuqiu menstruating through her mouth. Eew!!!

Anonymous said...

i agree with you however asking people to "go kill themselves" is a little too much. Why stoop to their level when you can just show them how great and mature you are compared to their punny minds. really. jiayous!

Unknown said...

dear qiu qiu,

yeahh i think you should do a mini competition as anonymous said, give them 100 bucks and ask them to buy cheap yet still wearable clothes. you are a very very damn good host you know :). i love your personality, a sweet attitude wrapped with beautiful face. don't give okayy. see! there are a lot a lot a lot of readers who love youuuu. i bet they won't watch budget barbie anymore if the host wasn't you hehehe.

cheer up xoxo

Unknown said...

dear qiu qiu

i think you should do a mini competition as anonymous mentioned before. give them 100 bucks and ask them to find cheap yet wearable clothes. then they will know how you feel. you know what, you are a very very very damn good host. your personality, your sincereness, cute little face. u just like a sweet chocolate wrapped with beautiful package. so don't give up :):). see! there are a lot lot lot of readers who love you very much, you have our supports. oh one more thing, i bet we won't watch budget barbie anymore if the host wasn't you :D

love korima xoxo

Sun soon said...

I like reading your blog and knowing whats happening .Coming to the comments you get.The comments you mentioned in the blog arent harsh or aggressive it gave an opinion. Being a known person you are bound to get different types of comments.What defines you is how you react to them. You reaction is harsher than theyve written which might hold back people who want to give honest opinions. Dont let people know you are rude or so.. my advice is check how star celebrities are handling these harsh comments and learn something.. You are a sweet lady and dont let people think otherwise

Shinyin said...

Hi Qiuqiu! Being a famous blogger definitely will have some haters but just wanna tell you that pls dont let it affect you. Those people are nobody to you and are just losers prolly jealous of your popularity or being able to be sponsored or stuffs like that. You are great in your own way and definitely a great host! How many people can actually host a show well and being all natural as themselves? Its not easy but you did it (: You are awesome and you did your best. I know its not easy to not let those nasty comments affect you but i'll like to encourage you that your mentality must be stronger. Love you and thanks for being such a great blogger! (: